Pressing Play

by - July 16, 2011

Have I mentioned I went to Ethiopia and my Dad is sick? Well I did, and he is. It feels like about 3 weeks ago the pause button on life got pushed, and I have been in some other reality. However, it is getting to be time to press play and rejoin regularly scheduled programming.

My watch just got wound back to central standard time. That is where it belongs. I know God allowed me to go to Ethiopia for a reason, but I don't have to know what that reason is. It was a wonderful and perspective changing experience. Even though a lot of what I saw there was difficult to grasp the trip itself was amazing. I miss them. I would love to go back someday. But I got a fortune cookie this week that said "The pleasure of what we enjoy is lost by wanting more." That makes sense, so central standard time it is.

I tried to go back to work on Wednesday. Actually I did go back to work on Wednesday, but I wasn't really there yet, my thoughts were all wrapped up in Ethiopia and Room 406, Mercy Hospital, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. I was able to do the tasks at hand. I saw a few clients which was the best part of being there, and got to catch a few friends up on the whirlwind of the last couple of weeks. I was still kind of running on auto-pilot though. Still running in mud.

Dad has been in the hospital for 14 days now. As he puts it, he's taken a few steps forward, and a few steps back. Thursday night was a step back as he was sick most of the night. Mom called me Friday morning for my update...and by noon I was on the road headed back to where my heart was. This morning the report is looking good. He has had two rounds of chemo now. The fight has begun. He is over the sick feeling he had, he ate nearly all of the low low priced Mercy Hospital oatmeal I fixed for him, and has just had a shower. He would be so totally annoyed if he knew I just shared that. He would say "nobody cares that I ate oatmeal and just got out of the shower." He can write his own blog.

He has a back brace and a pretty blond he's known since the 2nd grade that are ready to get him through these next few months. He had a couple of transfusions this week fighting the anemia, so once we can get him out of that bed and back to North Fourteenth Street, Ponca City, OK I think he will be ready to start getting on down this road. I am pretty sure regularly scheduled programming is not going to play out as we had anticipated, but that's alright. We have to live as though we believe what we say we believe:

"For this [gospel] I was appointed a herald, apostle, and teacher, and that is why I suffer these things. But I am not ashamed, because I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to guard what has been entrusted to me until that day." 2 Timothy 1:11 Man I love how the Word of God has everything we need for every circumstance we face.


I commit my Dad. I commit my time in Ethiopia. I commit the work of my hands and the meditations of my heart to the Lord. I commit to not live in fear of what tomorrow holds, because I know who holds tomorrow. I don't surrender just for the peace I find there, but because He is God, this life is a blink of an eye, our home is ultimately with him, and He is faithful. Because of his grace and his love I can put one foot in front of the other and pray that he allows me to be a reflection of His grace that is pleasing to him. Because of him I don't chase after the wind. Because of him I'm ready to press play...

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3 comments

  1. Reading "Pressing Play" made my heart dance! Glad you are pressing play -- works for me, too. Now, let's turn the volume up loud and proud, with Balance that allows us to continue to hear "the still small voice". Game on!- Mom

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  2. Haley... I want to say that I'm so sorry that you and your family are going through this because it is horrible, but there is a part of me that thinks if I say that, I'm discounting ALL the precious lessons and blessings God is giving you during this time. I wish He would present those gifts to you in a different way but I'm so in awe of how you are FULLY trusting in Him through it all. My thoughts and prayers remain with you, your dad and mom and the rest of your family. Thank you for "pressing play" and being such a tremendous witness of how to "trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." Take care of your family and know that this "sister" is home in Dallas... standing in the gap! Love you - KariB

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  3. Beautiful and inspiring words! Thanks for letting us in on this journey as it plays out.

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