Powered by Blogger.

Gracefully Frank

After my last post I joined my co-workers for a late dinner in the hotel before heading to the airport at midnight Dubai time.  Time becomes kind of a non-factor after a while, and the Dubai Airport is kind of amazing. Both understatements.  There were military guards throughout the airport wearing sage green uniforms, all built exactly the same as if genetically modified, and wearing red patent leather boots. I really wanted to take a picture of them, but also I really didn't want to get arrested. The ceilings and columns and lights and fountains are seriously beautiful.  They put on a good show.  We met three college grads from Texas in the customs line.  They were headed to Thailand for a graduation trip.  Brave kids.  I was hoping to get a little sleep on that 5 hour flight from Dubai to Colombo, and I ended up sleeping the whole time.  Except for about a 15 minute window where I opened my eyes for a second and realized the sun was about to rise.  Watching the sun rise from an airplane is awesome.  But really, watching the sunrise from anywhere is awesome. 



Then we landed in Sri Lanka.  Their airport looks a little different.



It reminded me a lot of the Addis Ababa airport.  I think I feel about Addis, like the cliche thought that we think of our first love fondly our whole life. (Unless your first love was a jerk, then it's not a good comparison.) Going to Ethiopia with Jess was the first time I knew for sure God was calling me to go, and what He did through that trip has strengthened me for each journey since.   We got checked into our hotel, and had a few hours to rest before having lunch with attendees, who by the weekend became friends. Thursday night we had a time of worship together and introductions.  All day Friday and Saturday we conducted the conference sessions.  Saturday afternoon the majority of us took an excursion into Colombo before having one final session and dinner on the beach together to close out the conference.  The hotel had a DJ set up on the beach as their Saturday night entertainment, and they played songs from the Dirty Dancing soundtrack and what must have been Billy Ocean's greatest hits album.  Surreal moment #432 "Am I really having dinner on a beach in Sri Lanka listening to Hungry Eyes?"  On Sunday, one of my co-workers got on a plane to India to do another few days of trainings.  The three of us that remained went to a church service with some new friends, toured the orphanage they are building, the daycare they are running, and then went to the site of the newest Hope Center they are opening in the slums of Colombo.  I am not sure they ever sleep.



Our hotel.


Our friends.


Dwelling places.


Our excursion.


They have beautiful smiles, but they don't show them when a camera is pointed at them.



Slum area.


The first stacking chair in the new Hope Center.  Phil talks a lot about stacking chairs, keeping the cost as low as possible, and having seating for as many people as possible.

In counseling, and especially in the ministry I work for, we talk a lot about getting to the heart of the matter.  Here is the heart of the matter of this trip for me: "And my God will supply all of your needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:19.   I remember thinking of this after leaving Ethiopia, how in a place where watering systems aren't available,  God sends the rain every day to water their crops to feed their people.  He meets their needs.  In Sri Lanka you see King Coconuts everywhere.  They are like big empty coconuts with sterilized water for drinking.  Literally, the water grows on trees.  They have turned their back on God, choosing to worship man made idols that offer no hope only rules, and yet The God who created them still supplies their needs by the fruit of the tree. His eye is on the sparrow, even while allowing them the consequences of their choices, and while He waits for them to be told of His grace.




 She is selling king coconuts.
 
I was constantly noticing the blank stares of the people on the roadsides with no life in their eyes in drastic contrast to the life in the eyes of those who have accepted Christ as their living water.  They are washed clean and the Hope they have found has brought them new life.  They cried out for it after years of war, and God heard their cry. He answered the prayers of the faithful and the repentant and He is on the move.  "For the eyes of the LORD move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His." 2 Chronicles 16:9  We heard several share their testimony of how God has completely changed their lives since attending the widows conference our director helped conduct in February.  They talked about how they have prayed for ways to go beyond just meeting the physical needs, but to meet the emotional and spiritual needs of those in their war torn communities.  They are the ones doing the hard work, and we had the privilege of help being a part of how God is equipping them for that calling.  Because of who He is, they are not who they were. Me, too.  They shared with us the story of this woman, who is a war widow, and how she had acquired poison and was planning on taking her life and the lives of her two children.  The ladies working in the new Hope Center stopped by her home to just do a home visit not knowing what they would find. Through them, God supplied her needs with people who care, food for her table, listening ears, and now a church home.  I wonder what plans He has for her sons.



Faces of Hope.

Faith in God gives us Hope.  Choose wisely where you put your faith though, because there are many choices out there that don't lead to hope, but to despair. Years of despair.  Generations of despair.  And despair leads to blank stares.  But, Hope leads to determined vision, and that is what we saw in the faces of those at the conference.  Faith, Hope, great Love and a determined vision.  Sounds a lot like what I'm seeing in the pictures and reports coming out of Moore, as I returned home to the news of the tornado.  I heard about it just 20 minutes or so before I got on a nearly 17 hour flight home.  At the time, there were still a few friends that hadn't been heard from as I turned off my phone and boarded the plane.  As I prayed on the flight, a world headline came on the airplane screen announcing that 91 people had been lost.  What a still sad relief to learn it was so many less than that, and that my friends and family were affected, but safe.

I am so moved by how God is supplying their needs through one another as it is always done in Oklahoma.   Where God is given the praise, as the work is being done.  I'm seeing facebook posts of friends in Ponca loading up trucks, offering their homes and help, and I am reminded of just how much I love Oklahoma (and Ponca friends). I know many of you probably saw Harry Smith say to Brian Williams "If you are waiting on the government for help, you'll be waiting a long time, but these Baptist Men, they will get it done tomorrow." The Baptist Men are just one organization of the many churches who are helping and loving those affected. They are known in particular because of their Faith, Hope and great Love, lived out in times of devastation.  God has given them a great ministry of mercy and they honor Him well. Our God is an awesome God who hears us when we pray, gives us water when we are thirsty (either bottled or in a king coconut), and regardless of whether or not we thank Him because He is merciful.  In Sri Lanka most don't thank Him as they are praying to thousands of gods, and decorating for "lord Buddha's birthday" as their elderly are literally sitting on the side of the road among trash.  But God is watching for hearts that are looking for Him, and He moves mountains to get to them.  In Moore, thanking Him comes a little more naturally, because we live in a land that is blessed from being founded on faith...even as that faith is being more and more rejected in the land.  I pray faith grows in their hearts and minds in Who He truly is as they help carry the burdens of one another through this tragedy.  In the end only one thing remains, our relationship with God through Jesus Christ who brought Hope into this world.  Faith in Him, leads to assurance of Heaven (being in the presence of God instead of out of His presence) of which we hope for and peace in this life in the midst of all circumstances either war-torn, or tornado-torn.  God gives us strength and supplies to do the work at hand because He has given us a great love for one another. Love that expresses itself through compassion, service, sacrifice and joy.  

"The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers (blank stares), so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. For what we preach is not ourselves, but Jesus Christ as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay (treasure = Hope through Christ, jars of clay= our lives) to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. 2 Corinthians 4:4-9 (see Moore, OK and Sri Lanka)



Our last night in Sri Lanka, we rode in a Tuk Tuk to go eat Pizza Hut pizza, and we weren't wearing seat belts. 


My view from the Tuk Tuk.


Monday morning, which was Sunday evening here in CST, we flew back to Dubai for a 14 hour layover.  We were bone tired, but for $30 US dollars you can take a 4 hour tour of the city.  Had it been a 3 hour tour I would not have gone.



Dubai looks like a comic book city.



World's tallest building.



As we entered an old museum, the calls to prayer began ringing out over the city from the tower on the right.




Thank you again for your prayers for this trip, and for going along with me through pictures and this blog.   
Share
Tweet
Pin
Share
No comments
Like clockwork, I woke up 10 minutes before my alarm went off this morning. It seems like everyday is busy, but today is one of those days that my busy looks a lot different than normal…again. Before my trip to India I was packed a week early. I was a little nervous leading up to that adventure. Last night I started putting it all in the suitcase about 8:30. The Lord has fought and won that battle for me. I’m not who I was. I got up this morning and walked in to push the on button on my single cup coffee maker, slid in a Tully’s Italian Roast Extra Bold k-cup, my favorite when I don’t French Roast Café Bustello in the morning. Have I mentioned I really really like a good cup of coffee? Then, I sat still with the Lord, and Moses and Jethro in Exodus where Jethro threw a little wisdom down and helped Moses with some strain he was experiencing. Then spent a little time thanking God for so much I can’t express and talked with him about some other things like this trip, this day, where He is leading, how he is getting me there, and prayed for some people I love.


Then I went for my walk around the park. I love music, I may have mentioned that before as well. And there are a lot of songs I like to hear in the morning. But, today I walked to David Crowder Band’s “For A Thousand Tongues To Sing” on repeat. I have two doves that seem to live in an iris patch that reminds me of home. Her name is Harriet. I don’t know what his name is. They walk through the irises every morning as I go through there. The old me would have not thought it was possible to go for a walk before going to the airport. My anxiousness would have kept me home kind of white-knuckle praying for safety. I am not who I was, and I enjoyed my walk.
Click Here to listen:  http://youtu.be/AWekq9bHtKU




I arrived at DFW and met up with three friendly faces I work with, that I get to share this journey. All four of us with totally different histories, but for this time our paths all line up. It is nice to share (pause for bumpy going through cloud ride….we’re lifting up out of the clouds now and it is starting to get a little smoother….blue sky back in view….uhhh more cloud, more bump, my face is like this :(. I’ve been watching Pete’s Dragon on the Disney favorites channel. I haven’t seen this in years. My brother and I used to watch it. In my mind we watched it a lot, but it may have only been a couple of times, but I know we watched it together. Little sisters remember stuff like that. The dragon always reminded me of my Uncle Zeke. More bumpy flight. “I will uphold you with my righteous right-hand” I like to think of His righteous right hand under the belly of the plane, with Him flying it around. Don’t judge. It gets me where I’m going. Back to Uncle Zeke. He didn’t have teeth and neither does Pete’s Dragon. That is the kind of thing that sticks out to a little kid I think. Uncle Zeke only wore zip up coveralls, and is one of two men that ever lived that my Grandpa Corky’s dog Gretch ever bit. The other man wore zip up coveralls too. Gretch hated men in zip up coveralls. Ugh this is a bumpy flight which is why I’m rambling as I write this. I’m trying to focus on something and not freak out. Kind of like Chunk did in Goonies when the Fertelli’s were going to put his hand in the blender. He just started telling stories. I’m just typing as this plane gets knocked around. Reminding myself to breathe I just realized the bumps have stopped. Clock says 12 hours and 39 more minutes to Dubai, I hope that is the last of it.   Or you may get to read more about doves at that park (where some turbulance began) Goonies and Uncle Zeke.  He would be worth reading about, but that's not my story to tell.



Uh...That wasn’t the last of it. First of all there was a bump in the dinner as they ran out of saffron chicken before they got to our aisle. The other options were some kind of kidney bean veggie dish (public service announcement: don’t eat beans on a plane) or the lamb. I had lamb. I think for the first time ever. I don’t remember ever having lamb before. After Anne, Yasmin and I, the women of row 34 seats A, B and C (I’m in the window seat) finished eating our meals and visiting a little. I know a lot more about Anne than Yasmin, but both ladies were very nice, I decided to listen to music for a while. I listened to one song and then the flight got bad somewhere high above Canada. Pull it together Canada! It was probably the worst turbulence I’ve ever been in, Yasmin and Anne agreed. It felt bad there for a minute. I couldn’t write to distract myself…and I might have cried just a little bit. As it really started to get bad the song on my playlist changed: “Walking stumbling, on these shadow feet…” ok I like this song focus on the words...chorus: “When the world is falling out from under me…” Panic. Lord! I don’t want the world to fall out from under me!!! Not funny. Pulling my phone out to change the song the next words “Ill be found in You, still standing…” Ok. I’m going to ride out this turbulence and I’m not going to change this song. Figuratively the world has fallen out from under me before. Now I’m in a literal position for it to do so…but I’ll be found in You, still standing.” I’m not who I was. He has made me new. He makes me new. Sometimes I don’t enjoy it. Sometimes my gut drops out from under me, but He is faithful regardless of the smoothness of the ride. I kept reminding Him that He calms the sea with just a word, and I asked Him to speak calm into the wind. Then He reminded me while the guys on the boat were panicking, he was resting because there was no need to panic. The seatbelt light is finally off. It’s 2:30 am Colombo time. I’m going to try to nap and breathe deep again. I did have an opportunity to share Isaiah 41:10 with Anne and Yasmin after that was all over. So, I would go through that again. But, I really bad don’t want to.

This is what airplane dinner looks like. 

I was able to get some uncomfortable sleep. It’s kind of like spending 15 hours in a 4’x1’ box. If those calculations aren’t reasonable...whatever. It’s a small space. I didn’t get to watch all the movies I planned on watching. Timothy Keller is to blame. I’m reading The Meaning of Marriage. Don’t get hung up in the irony. It is a great book that I will start suggesting and buying for friends and family. Married or not. So good. Read it. Read anything he writes.



When I woke up, I looked up the onboard map of where we were. Flying over Bagdad. That’s where we were. Out of scud range though I’m sure. I saw an oil rig in the middle of the gulf burning. That was kind of cool. And several ships that I imagine were pirates. We are now entering our final dissent into 99 degree Dubai. We’ll have an 11 hour layover and have received hotel vouchers. So I’ll go to a room now and relax and stretch. Here is what flying into Dubai looks like out my window seat 34A.


There may be some green in these lawns, but everything is really mostly sand.

It’s funny that God would take someone who never wanted adventure outside of Oklahoma, and even prayed for predictable and safe and for life to look exactly like everyone else’s (in my mind), and breaks chains, increases passion and leads me here. What he does in me, isn’t just for me, it’s so that He may be lived through me, which is what we are going to Sri Lanka to do... And He isn’t scared of anything.  I'm not who I was, because of who He is.

Pretty sure it wasn't Him in me that just paid $6 USD for a cup of coffee.  It's about a 4 oz cup. We’ll leave for Sri Lanka at 2:45am Dubai time. Time means less and less the further from Dallas we get.


Someone likes playing with Instagram. :)
 
Share
Tweet
Pin
Share
3 comments
One of the first symbolic acts I did after deciding to leave Tulsa was buy a red umbrella.  No one ever made me carry black umbrellas for years, but I had chosen to as an act of conformity.  Black umbrellas are perfectly fine, but my favorite color is red.  Again, (and this is key) I had a choice all along, but I didn't live like I did.  Then, once upon a time, God set me free from my own choices.  He drew me with loving kindness...to snap out of it.  So, I staged a rebellion against the path I was on, and I bought a red umbrella...even though there wasn't a cloud in the sky.  Umbrellas have been popping up a lot lately.

In my counseling sessions it has become routine that I draw to help illustrate a point. When I draw it I talk less, and we both have something to look at and consider.  So on my yellow notepad I will scribble out a scene as they've described it, or illustrate quickly a concept we are discussing about their circumstance.   There is a reason some books come with pictures, why when you build a building you have floor plans, and why pictures capture a moment, a face, a sunset like our words may not always be able.  We are visual.  For some reason stick figures and circles and lines and x's and arrows and boxes and rain and umbrellas seem to help picture the story a client's words are saying.  And, help them see the forest on the other side of the big dead tree they've carried into the room. 

Picture an umbrella.  A hand grasping it.  Rain falling under the inside. I've seen this concept before, probably you have too.

So many of us are living under someone else's umbrella, where the rain falls inside soaking us with doubt and fear and hurt and anxiety and injustice and suspicions, faulty expectations, and ...and...and.  What we don't realize is it is our own hand that is grasping the handle of the umbrella.  We may not be able to make the umbrella go away...but we can lay it down.  No one can make us carry an umbrella. We have a choice. 

Sometimes putting the umbrella down takes a lot of effort on our part that may not seem fair.  If you, like me or like them, when an opportunity for freedom and forgiveness and new life have been offered, have found yourself saying "but she," "but he," "but they," "but why," "if they would only" or "but I should be" ...  You may be holding a reverse umbrella, that either you are grasping or someone else is holding over you.  And, it is soaking you to the bone.  It may take forgiveness.  Humility.  Letting go.  Getting sober.  Getting on a plane.  Saying I'm sorry.  Giving love unconditionally.  Committing. Taking people at their word.  Remembering that vengeance is God's, and so is justice.  Or just laying a burden down, letting the Lord fight the battle.  Not grasping the umbrella, choosing to let the rain drown you as you are striving to make them agree with you, love you, like you, take care of you, provide for you, show you the way, make you new, or give their life for you.  Christ already did, does and will. 

I have loved you with an everlasting love... Jeremiah 31:3
My God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus... Philippians 4:19
Your ears will hear a word behind you, "this is the way, walk in it"... Isaiah 30:21
If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold the new has come... 2 Corinthians 5:17
For Christ also died for sins once for all, for the just and the unjust, so that He might bring us to God... 1 Peter 3:18

We don't have to fix whoever gave us the umbrella, we just have to come out from under it.  God will do the rest. I have experienced that, and get to witness that, so that I may testify to that. The surprise in doing the hard work of letting go is that sometimes even though the rain may continue to fall and that umbrella may still be laying in your yard (they may not change, cancer may still be present, consequences set in motion may still happen), we begin maybe for the first time ever to take one finger at a time off of the handle; allowing us to take the hand of God, and walk out into the sun where His promises are for you and great is His faithfulness... Even when no one else's is.  God's grace for you isn't contingent on the beliefs or actions of anyone else lining up with your expectations.  We can't look to others to fulfill His promise of salvation, justice, redemption, love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.  All of that is just between us and Him which takes a lot of pressure off of the people around us and relationships we are in. 

Stage a rebellion against your own choices, beliefs and behaviors that have you grasping an umbrella that is drowning you.  Lay it down.  Love first, instead of waiting to love in response to.  We were created in the image of God for a purpose...discover it. He wants you to know.  Step out from under the umbrella where life is happening to you, and feel the sun on your face as you step into God's plans for you...plans to prosper you, not to harm you.  Plans to give you hope and a future.  "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly." John 10:10  Prosperity and hope that have everything to do with your heart and making it new right where you are.  And, the result is freedom. Real freedom."So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." John 8:36  Freedom to lay it down and enjoy the sun that is already shining.  How do we do this?  Seek first the kingdom of God through His Word, His Church and His Spirit. Seek Him.  Stop trying to make things/others right, and let Him make you right.  He will show you the way.  He will give you Freedom. Peace. Joy. Get to know Him, instead of trying to be known, understood or have justice.  His Word says he already knows you, understands you and is your justice.  Ungrasp.  If you've never started before, maybe begin with the Book of John.  You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.  I will be found by you declares the Lord... Jeremiah 29:13-14a.  You are loved way beyond your imagination.  Take His hand, and step out into the sun that will continue to shine even on rainy days.

Here are a couple of recent rainy and sunny moments captured in my own life.  I didn't realize it was raining as I walked down the flights of stairs to go for a morning walk.  My first thought was "well, I can't walk this morning."  My second thought was, "yes, I can."  Mix in a little rain, a little walking, and my favorite playlists and I about passed out from joy. Playing in the rain is much better than drowning in it.

Rain

This past Sunday afternoon I drove home to Texas after a weekend home in Oklahoma.  (I know I used the word home twice.)  I had a great weekend with people I love.  I watched a movie in 3D with some m&m's and best friends, (PS I love Iron Man), and forfeited $5 in a card game that I couldn't stay awake to finish.  I went toilet papering after midnight.  Yes, I did.  Watched a little Thunder.  Sat on a back patio with one of my favorite people in the world talking about life, and then got in the car and drove in the direction of the Red River.  I kept watching the sun lowering throughout my drive singing every word to every Mumford & Sons song because I am Still. Not. Over. Them. and thinking to myself this is going to be a pretty sunset, and then...it was.  I took an exit, pulled off the road, got out of my car, walked to the wheat field and lived the last few minutes of it in person. (this is the way, walk in it) I'm so glad I did.


Sun

Share
Tweet
Pin
Share
1 comments
Newer Posts
Older Posts

H.S.

About Me

...because she considered him faithful...

Categories

Storytelling Places Visited Lessons Learned Family Cancer Believe Holiday Lady Birds

recent posts

Blog Archive

  • ►  2022 (3)
    • ►  December (1)
    • ►  August (2)
  • ►  2020 (2)
    • ►  May (1)
    • ►  February (1)
  • ►  2019 (2)
    • ►  August (1)
    • ►  May (1)
  • ►  2018 (1)
    • ►  March (1)
  • ►  2017 (9)
    • ►  December (1)
    • ►  July (1)
    • ►  June (1)
    • ►  May (2)
    • ►  April (2)
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  January (1)
  • ►  2016 (9)
    • ►  November (2)
    • ►  July (1)
    • ►  June (2)
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  February (1)
    • ►  January (2)
  • ►  2015 (6)
    • ►  November (1)
    • ►  September (1)
    • ►  April (1)
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  February (2)
  • ►  2014 (22)
    • ►  December (1)
    • ►  November (2)
    • ►  September (2)
    • ►  July (1)
    • ►  June (2)
    • ►  May (1)
    • ►  April (5)
    • ►  March (2)
    • ►  February (3)
    • ►  January (3)
  • ▼  2013 (14)
    • ►  December (1)
    • ►  September (3)
    • ►  July (1)
    • ►  June (1)
    • ▼  May (3)
      • Supplies
      • First Leg
      • Umbrellas
    • ►  March (2)
    • ►  February (2)
    • ►  January (1)
  • ►  2012 (18)
    • ►  December (1)
    • ►  November (2)
    • ►  October (2)
    • ►  September (2)
    • ►  August (1)
    • ►  July (2)
    • ►  June (1)
    • ►  May (1)
    • ►  April (2)
    • ►  March (1)
    • ►  February (1)
    • ►  January (2)
  • ►  2011 (24)
    • ►  December (2)
    • ►  November (2)
    • ►  October (2)
    • ►  September (3)
    • ►  August (3)
    • ►  July (9)
    • ►  June (3)

Search This Blog

copyright 2017

copyright 2017